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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/23384305">If You Love Me, Let Me Go</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnimalDisco/pseuds/AnimalDisco'>AnimalDisco</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Panic! at the Disco</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Abusive Relationships, Dubious Consent, Emotional Manipulation, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Living Together, Rape/Non-con Elements</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>In-Progress</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-03-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-03-29</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-01 15:06:58</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Rape/Non-Con</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>1,828</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/23384305</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/AnimalDisco/pseuds/AnimalDisco</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Just get away from Him. That's all I could think of as I ran away from my boyfriend. When I saw a house coming up, I Went to it, hoping whoever was there could help me. What I didn't expect was that it would be Brendon and Sarah Urie's house. Maybe they will be able to help me get out. I hope they can, because I don't know how much longer I'll last.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Original Female Character/Original Male Character, Sarah Orzechowski/Brendon Urie</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>4</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>If You Love Me, Let Me Go</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>Hello everyone. So, this is a story I've been working on for a few months now, and I thought I would upload the first chapter and see what people think. As for characterization, Brendon and Sarah share the names of the real life people, and they were the inspiration to this story, but I don't think this story captures their personalities so much anymore. I think they evolved in this story to their own characters. Anyways, I'm open to any feedback, so if you have any thoughts, please let me know!</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>
  <span>Fuck. Fuck this, fuck th</span>
  <span>at, fuck all of it. This was the most stupid idea I’ve ever had. Why did I think this would be a good idea? Travelling half way across the country to spend a week with him. I’ll definitely be more careful in the future.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>I walked down the gravel path in the middle of nowhere all on my own. I had no phone, no extra clothes, nothing. All I took with me </span>
  <span>when I had moved in with Him, </span>
  <span>was left at His house. And I’m not going back there. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Whilst lost in my thoughts, I tripped over the gravel beneath me and plunged straight into the jagged stones. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>‘Shit,’ </span>
  </em>
  <span>I thought to myself as I pulled myself up once more and examined the damage. I had really torn the trousers I was wearing. And the skin beneath them didn’t look much better. My elbow also hurt a lot, and started to feel more and more damp. I didn’t even bother to look at it. I already knew the state it was in.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Somewhere in the distance, I heard a car approaching. The sound sounded like it was coming from behind me. Thinking the worst, I jumped into the trees and hid from the sight of the road. The car came passed slowly, as if looking for something. Or someone. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Lucy?” I heard that all too familiar voice calling for me from the car. I stayed hidden, the panic </span>
  <span>coursing</span>
  <span> through my veins.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Once the car had disappeared out of sight, I got out of the trees and continued on my way. I decided that I had to stop at the next house I saw, or risk being spotted by Him.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>As I continued on my way, I came out to a clearing. Down a long path, I saw a house. Not wanting to risk being out in the open longer than I had to, I headed as quickly as I could towards the house. I hadn’t initially felt the pain from my fall, but suddenly I started to feel it more and more. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>I hobbled as quickly as I could to the front door, throwing worried glances over my shoulder in case He were to return. I knocked on the door, hoping someone were home. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Footsteps sounded on the other side of the door. I threw one last quick glance towards the road before the door in front of me was opened. The sight of the person in front of me drew a gasp from my body. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>The man, standing right in front of me was Brendon </span>
  <span>Urie</span>
  <span>. Brendon saw the recognition in my face and let out a sigh of frustration. He turned to close the door, but I stopped him without thinking. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“No, wait. Please, I know what this looks like, but it really isn’t! I need your help. Please! Before he comes back!”</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He stopped trying to close the door at my words. “What are you on about?” He asked me. It was just then he properly looked at me. All the cuts and bruises and ripped clothes, mainly from my fall, but that wasn’t something I was going to tell him right now. Not when he was just about to help me out. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Come in,” he said stepping to the side to allow me access in to his home.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Hastily, I stepped</span>
  <span> into the house. Before Brendon </span>
  <span>had a chance to close his front door, I </span>
  <span>had already slammed it shut behind me.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>I took some </span>
  <span>quick, deep breaths, the momentary relief hitting me. </span>
  <span>The pain and tiredness of everything that had happened hit me all at once. I felt my body go weak, but did my best to </span>
  <span>keep my composure. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“</span>
  <span>I think you owe me </span>
  <span>an </span>
  <span>explanation,</span>
  <span>” Brendon said sternly to </span>
  <span>me</span>
  <span>, his arms crossed</span>
  <span>.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>As I was thinking how to explain the situation best, I heard movement from </span>
  <span>behind Brendon, moving towards us.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Who was it, Sweetie?” a voice </span>
  <span>said. It was a woman, who must be Brendon's</span>
  <span> wife, Sarah. As she came into view, I saw her slender figure with her dark brown hair stop next to Brendon. The look on her face turned from curiosity to shocked horror as soon as she saw me. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh my goodness! Are you okay?” Her concerned voice asked me. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Sort of,” I said, glancing down at my body properly for the first time since I fell. I really did look in an awful state. The clothes I was wearing were so tattered, and where they’s been ripped by the fall, the blood from my wounds had stained their edges. The skin below the clothes didn’t look much better either. I really wasn’t ‘sort of’ okay. It was pretty bad. And then I was only talking about what was visible on the outside.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Come with me,” Sarah said, grabbing my arm in one of few places I wasn’t injured and pulled me deeper into the house and into a bathroom. Sitting me down on the edge of the bathtub, Sarah turned around to start routing through the cupboards. Stepping back and turning to face me, I saw she had some first aid supplies in her hands. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Right, if you can pull up your sleeves and pants, I’ll take care of your wounds,” Sarah said to me, kneeling on the floor beside me. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Pants...” I said in a confused ponder to myself at first before it clicked. “Oh yeah, you’re American. Trousers. Right,” I said more to myself than Sarah as I bent down and rolled up my trousers and my sleeves before letting Sarah get to work on my injuries. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>The disinfectant she put on my wounds stung. I breathed in sharply through my teeth at the sensation. During the time Sarah had been tending to me, Brendon had quietly appeared in the doorway. His narrow eyes were focused on me.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Sarah busied herself around me, quickly disinfecting my wounds before sticking a plaster over them. Brendon’s eyes never once left me, they barely even blinked. It was like he was trying to keep me in place with his stare in case I tried to do something to harm his wife. I stayed as still as I possibly could; only moving under Sarah’s instructions.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“There we go. All done,” Sarah said, getting to her feet and helping me do the same. Brendon’s eyes still hadn’t moved off of me. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Sarah, noticing the way her husband was staring at me, and rolled her eyes at him. She clapped her hand against his chest with an audible ‘thwack’. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Don’t stare at her like that. You’re </span>
  <span>gonna</span>
  <span> kill her with that death glare. Be nice,” Sarah said as she left the room. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>I was now left alone with Brendon, who desperately wanted answers. And I’m pretty sure the questions he wanted answered weren’t questions she felt like she could currently answer. Not like this. Not to someone she barely knew. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Brendon closed the door, giving them some more privacy before he started the conversation that felt more like an interrogation. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“How did you find out where I lived?” Was the first question he posed. “Has it been leaked? Do people online know where I live now?”</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>I didn’t know you lived here,” I answered quickly. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh really? You just expect me to believe you were out in the middle of nowhere and happened to stumble upon my house?”</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Yes. Well, I see how it looks. I understand if you find it hard to believe, but honestly that is the case.”</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He nodded slightly, giving the ground a slight smile of disbelief. “Even if I do believe that you just accidentally found my house, what will stop you from telling others about where I live?”</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Well, for starters I don’t have a phone.” Brendon pushed himself up from the wall he’d been leaning against throwing his hands up in the air.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Oh course. You don’t have a phone. I should have realized,” Brendon said. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“I mean it. Feel free to search me if you don’t believe it,” I told him, lifting up my arms to prove my willingness. The look he had told me he was thinking about it, but then decided against it. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Fine, I believe you when you say you don’t have a phone. Then comes a follow up question; why don’t you have a phone?”</span>
  
</p><p>
  <em>
    <span>‘</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>Ahh</span>
  </em>
  <em>
    <span>, this is where things start getting tricky,’ </span>
  </em>
  <span>I thought to myself. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s... a long story,” I started out, not wanting to lie to Brendon after his hospitality, even though it was forced out of him. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>My gaze focused on the wall as my mind dissociated from the present. It went back to the past. The very recent past. </span>
  <span>I felt the emotions within me start to well up, and I did my best to push them away and </span>
  <span>bring myself back to the present and the situation at hand.</span>
  
</p><p><span>“I have time,”</span><span> Brendon </span><span>said</span><span>, his voice</span><span> pulling</span> <span>my gaze from the wall to him.</span></p><p>
  <span>My voice stuttered in my throat before I had the chance to form coherent words. I couldn’t. I couldn’t tell him. The fear of being judged and the consequences were something I couldn’t bear to face. I'd rather take my chances out in the open again. I tried to will my feet to move towards the front door, but they stayed put, as if telling me staying here was my best option.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“It’s with my boyfriend- ex-boyfriend, I mean,” I quickly corrected myself. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Is the breakup the reason you’re out here?” Brendon asked, suddenly sounding like he was taking me more seriously. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>I nodded slowly, not sure how much I wanted to give away. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Did he hurt you?” I froze at the question. I had no idea what to say. I couldn’t answer it. Brendon didn’t need a reply from me though, the look on his face told me he knew. </span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“I’ll go and call the police,” Brendon said, turning around and opening the door to the bathroom once more.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“No!” I shouted as I felt my body pull itself forward to stop him. </span>
  <span>Launching</span>
  <span> forward, I slammed the </span>
  <span>door shut</span>
  <span>, pushing my weight against it.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>“Please, no,” I choked out in a broken voice.</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>Brendon stared at me, pondering what to do. “You really aren’t easy to deal with, are you? Fine, I won’t. It’s something you </span>
  <span>gotta</span>
  <span> decide for yourself anyway. Stay here if you want, until we figure out what to do with you. I doubt Sarah will let me just leave you out there as things are anyway.”</span>
  
</p><p>
  <span>He opened the door once more and this time walked out of it, leaving me completely alone in the bathroom. I stood there for a bit completely in shock. </span>
  <span>Today had taken so many twists and turns I barely </span>
  <span>knew what had happened. The only thing I did know at this point was that Brendon </span>
  <span>Urie</span>
  <span> had taken me in and I was now staying with him.</span>
  
</p>
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